Explanation Writing

Today we were learning about elaborating on our ideas for explanation writing using this straw game

We broke down each stage of writing an explanation piece from title to conclusion.

The children wrote a topic sentence, gave an example and then a personal voice.  Here is a piece of writing that was written today. 

How to get the paper past the ribbon ?

In my writing I will be explaining how to play the straw game. Pungawerewere students collected their equipment for the game, equipment we needed was ribbon and straw but you can also use string. Then got into 2 lines facing each other to play the game. Lastly we played the game.

Firstly,  We collected our equipment.  We collected our blue straws and a white piece of paper. I thought we were going to spit the paper out of our straw but that never happened. Luckily that would have been gross.

Secondly, Pungawerewere got into 2 lines face to face. After we sat behind the ribbon I could not wait for the next instruction. In my opinion I was so excited I felt like beating everyone and totally forgot it was all just a game.

Thirdly, Our class started to play but first Mr Savage had to get his flash phone out to record us and to see all our unbelievable faces we make. Our first round Mr Savage told us the rules the first one was not to go past the line and you have to do 2 blows. Once he was finish telling us the rules we started our first game. Ready Set GOOOOO! I was off but something went wrong I went past the line cause I was excited, it was so much fun. The winners were Deshay and Torian because they played fair.

In conclusion I explained how to play the straw game.It was really awesome to play against my teammates especially the ones i don't really hang out with.we used a straw and a piece of paper to play with and got into 2 lines face to face behind the ribbon. I felt so excited playing the game and i can not believe

By Lialia

Most improve writer

How to get the paper past the ribbon

In my writing I will be explaining our Straw game. We collected our equipment for the game, we got into 2 lines facing each other, then we played the game.

Firstly room 19 collected their equipment.  We were given a straw and a piece of paper.  I thought we were going to spit the paper out of the straw. That would have been gross.

Secondly the children got into 2 lines. After we sat in front of the ribbon facing each other. I was feeling super excited.

Finally we played the game (yay), it was so fun to play. What you had to do was blow the paper ball in the middle of the ribbons. The stink things is I didn't win Deshay and Torian did.

In summary I talked about the straw game it was awesome to play against my class mates.  We played with a straw and a piece of paper. We sat down behind the ribbon facing each other with excitement.

By Nevaeh